“You were thinking it!”

“Yeah, but you said it!”

I think we all need to have a little talk. Everyone is thinking it, so I’m going to come out and say it… will.i.am is so stupid. He’s talented in some ways, namely music, and I don’t know him personally but friends who know him say he’s an arrogant asshole. That doesn’t matter, though. What matters is how ridiculous will.i.am’s entire foray into the tech world is, and has been.

Shall we take a trip down memory lane together and remember how when everyone knew BlackBerry was dead in the water, this idiot was launching a failed social network and being trotted out by BlackBerry at the company’s conferences? Or how his iPhone camera attachment took the world by storm?

But no, we now have to actually think about and process the most stupid of stupids: a ridiculous cuff with a tiny display that goes on your wrist. One that has names like “aneeda” and “puls.” Let’s not mention the fact that there is an on-screen keyboard that is smaller than a quarter for you to try to peck and type on, or how will.i.am doesn’t even know how much battery the iPhone offers when he’s running around saying that his ankle monitor lasts for the same amount of time. Or why anyone in the world would buy a device that’s going to cost north of $500 in addition to their smartphone when this offers absolutely nothing of use.

Forget being better than the upcoming Apple Watch, this isn’t even better than Android Wear, which is at least a little useful.

He’s like the middle-aged uncle that has all these crazy ideas every time you see him and you can’t get away from him because he doesn’t know when to stop talking. A backpack with speakers that has batteries in it! A jacket that has batteries in it and wireless charging that charges the dog collar on your wrist!

There’s no filter to Will. He might actually be able to make some great products with an awesome company if there was a way to reel him in, but he has too much money and arrogance to work with any of them.

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