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Inappropriate places to play Pokemon Go, ranked

Pokemon Go Tips

Whether you like Pokemon Go or not, the game is here to stay. But there’s a time and a place for catching tiny AR creatures, a fact that seems to have bypassed some players. So far Pokemon aficionados have committed crimes, invaded hospitals and the Scientologists, and pissed off the entire nation of Germany.

We’re only a week in, and already there’s an unbelievable list of dumb places people have played Pokemon Go. If you’ve seen worse, please email me; otherwise, sit back, and revel in other people’s misfortune.

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18. Nuclear power facilities

Either you’ll get shot, or have to explain to a jury of your peers what Pokemon Go is.

17. Other people’s houses

Is a crime still a crime if it’s done for Pokemon? Yep.

16. Elementary school

Trespassing bad. Trespassing into an elementary school, where you may well get on the sex offender registry and be ruined for life, extra bad.

15. The Church of Scientology

This is only bad because it might give the Scientologists the impression that they’re popular.

14. While your wife is giving birth

“She wasn’t mad. She gave me an eyeroll once she realised what I was doing”


13. The White House

I guess if you’re going to play a smartphone game while visiting the nation’s seat of power, at least do it right

12. Court rooms

I wonder if playing Pokemon during your sentencing counts as contempt of court.

11. The Vatican

There’s probably a joke here to be made about the Catholic Church using new-fangled technology to lure in impressionable children, but let’s just read this excellent comic instead.

10. Hospitals

Leaving the scary imagery of Pokemon attacking sick people aside, it’s not really fair to pick a Pokemon fight with people who are stuck in bed.

9. Arlington National Cemetery

8. A funeral home


7. Anywhere with dead bodies, really

6. Strip clubs

Strip clubs: famously tolerant of people pulling out cameras and recording things

5. Public washrooms

Using a camera in a public washroom is never OK. Not even for Pokemon.

4. An actual minefield

History books, 2046: “The Pokemon Wars of 2016 started innocently enough, with a battle over a gym between North and South Korea. But it wasn’t long until the two sides deployed heavy artillery to gain control of that rare Pika.”


3. The front line of the war against ISIS

“Mortars are for pussies”


2. The Holocaust Memorial Museum

Should go without saying, but apparently it needed saying

1. Auschwitz

You probably didn’t think there existed a worse place than the Holocaust museum to play Pokemon, but you’d be wrong. It turns out that while you shouldn’t catch them all in Nazi Germany’s deadliest death camp, you can, and some people have.

According to the New York Times, the Auschwitz Museum has asked for the game to be removed from its premises.