We all love learning about life hacks on the Internet, although many of these purported hacks aren’t necessarily good ideas to follow. Stephen Colbert decided to come up with some rather dubious life hacks of his own on The Late Show last week and they’re definitely not pieces of advice you should ever use in real life.

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How unhelpful are Colbert’s life hacks? In one case, he recommends that if you can’t remember a coworker’s name and don’t want to ask them, just call them “honey” and “baby” and then when you get sued for sexual harassment, you’ll see their name on the subpoena. Another hack involves pretending you own a miniature pony by looking at your full-sized horse from farther away. He also recommends cutting your electric bill by plugging everything in your house into a series of daisy-chained power strips to trick the power company into thinking you’re only using one outlet.

Check out the whole segment below.