Dating is awkward, but nothing is more anxiety-inducing than a first date. The most you can realistically hope for is a pleasant experience with someone you’ve never met, but sadly, that’s not always the way the cookie crumbles.

Anne Thériault, a Toronto-based writer, recently stumbled upon one of these nightmare scenarios while sitting in a coffee shop and did what any quick-witted, tech-literate person would do — she live-tweeted the whole thing.

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“Watching a couple on what appears to be a terrible first coffee date at the table next to me,” reads the first tweet. “Dude is every precious self-involved writer.”

It just gets worse from there:

It’s truly incredible, and thankfully Toronto’s blogTO strung together the whole event in Storify, so you can read the entire exchange from Anne’s point of view without scrolling endlessly through a Twitter feed. The tweets quickly made the rounds after the live-tweet session concluded, eliciting the following priceless response from Thériault:

She immediately clarified that she isn’t complaining. You can support Thériault on her Patreon account.

Jacob started covering video games and technology in college as a hobby, but it quickly became clear to him that this was what he wanted to do for a living. He currently resides in New York writing for BGR. His previously published work can be found on TechHive, VentureBeat and Game Rant.